Co-sleeping, bed-sharing, or sleep-sharing.

vic

Last night, I decided to put Victoire in her own bed, in her own room. I am not sure what triggered the decision – she was starting to fuss and I wasn’t ready to go to sleep but didn’t want to leave my bedroom either (Daddy was away) so I thought: “mon beau chat*”, tonight is the night. You are going to sleep by yourself, like a big girl. I kissed her and wished her goodnight. I left the room and felt sick to my stomach. I wasn’t enjoying not having her with me – as we always do. I felt incomplete. I missed her. I went back. Picked her up. And we had a very good night sleep.

I realize that I am not ready to part with her – exclusively breastfeeding her has created a bond so strong that I feel I can’t let go of her for too long. But I need to find a happy medium, I would like to spend some time with my husband and just cuddle, and dream together without a squirmy little individual in between us.

If you have any experience co-sleeping and would like to share tips or “I hear you” type of thoughts and feelings, I am all ears. Especially if you have experience breastfeeding without co-sleeping! I am not even sure that it is what I want. I just know I need to find a better way of balancing one-on-one time with my husband (or myself for that matter, sometimes, I just want time alone) and cuddly-time with baby.

*I nicknamed her my pretty cat.

What Ever Happened To My Great Sleeper?!

How do you tell such cute face “not your bed! mine!”?

Sixtine used to be a great sleeper. As soon as she turned 2 months, I decided that it was time for her to sleep in her own room. It only took about three days, and perseverance and consistency! Then we went to France for four months and shared the same bedroom. I would go to sleep long after she would but I am pretty sure she was laughing inside knowing exactly what was going on! I am sleeping with Mama! Yay!  Now that we are back, Sixtine is almost 9 months, she is teething (her two front upper teeth are piercing through), she is learning a million new tricks everyday and she is facing separation anxiety. Plus, this is a new environment for her, Paris was loud, busy, and the house was filled of laughter, a barking chiwawa dog, aunties and Nana. Here, it is just me and her. And it is as quiet as quiet can be. You may have guessed by now:

She won’t sleep alone! Every time I put her in bed, she screams for me to come back. And she is not pretending, she is really upset, you should see her. It is heart-breaking. I have been rocking her to sleep, cuddling her to sleep, and even lying down in bed with her for two weeks now. She usually sleeps in our bed after she first wakes up in the middle of the night. She sleeps so peacefully when she is with us.

I can’t blame her – she is being such a trooper. She is probably missing what she thought was her home, her aunties, grandmother and all the little things that make you feel come home. She is showing interest in my own little thing that I used to sleep with ( I am using the past here, but really, it is a lie. I still sleep with it.), I think it has my smells and that it comforts her somehow.

I am hoping that it is just a phase and that it will pass. I want her to feel happy in her own bed again.

How To Get Over A Bad Day

  1. Put something comfy on.
  2. Close the curtains.
  3. Take your baby to bed with you.
  4. Snuggle.
  5. Snuggle a little more.
  6. Appreciate your baby as s/he squeals with excitement. What a fun treat!
  7. Say: “We don’t need anything but each other. You are my best friend and I love you”.
  8. It should feel better.